Table of Contents:
“…-- I'll Be Your Tour Guide -- Pale Force -- Learnin' Them -- A Self-Portrait -- Your Special Day -- Losing My Religion -- No Such Thing as a Free Babysitter -- How to Put Five Kids to Bed in a Two-Bedroom Apartment -- Negotiating with Terrorists -- My Former Bed -- Morning Has Been Broken -- Naps Are Payday Loans -- Get Married, Have Kids, Get Fat -- Hand-in-Mouth Disease -- We Need Bread -- You Win, McDonald's -- How Sweet It Is -- 'Tis the Season -- My Other Family -- Are You Done Yet? -- Six Kids,
Catholic -- The Great White Baby -- The Mousetrap -- Picture This --
Snow Job -- On the Road Again -- Eskimo Pies -- You're Going to Miss This -- Acknowledgments.…”
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